The Awesome Haiku Experiment

My friend Kyle had to relocate to a small town for work. While he’s there, he’s working weird hours, and is generally bored out of his poor little mind. So he invented a game. It’s called the Awesome Haiku Experiment. It totally sounds like the title to a Big Bang Theory episode, if they were all about poetry, and not the polar opposite of poetry.
The rules are simple! You find an anonymous chat site, and introduce yourself as a young (legal) female from California. Then, you offer to show them your boobs if they write you a haiku. It doesn’t matter if you’re actually a girl or not, because no one actually sees boob, obviously. Most of the time, guys will actually go ahead and make (brutal) attempts at writing haikus in order to see the non-existent breasts.
Once Liam and I got hold of this, we decided to add on to it. Instead of leaving the poet empty handed, we send them pictures. Depending on what we offer or they ask for, we send picture of a pair of tit birds, or a pair of boobie birds. (They’re real, just look them up!)
Here are some of the haikus Liam and I received during a drunken game of it, after a beautiful wedding:
  • Stranger: your so beautiful you make the sun and moon jealous your more beautiful than they 
  • Stranger: Fuck Haikus are hard
    They usually don’t make sense
  • You: can you make it about puppies?
    Stranger: k
    Stranger: its really weird but
    Stranger: I merely called “come”
    little black Lab wheeled and launched
    transformed super-pup! 
  • Stranger: hot summer of code
    students learned a lot, had fun
    everyone wins! 
  • Stranger: oh omegle person
    Stranger: wont u please show me
    Stranger: ur proble so sexy its hard to bare
    Stranger: wont u please let me see u bare
    (how is that a haiku at all?)
  • Stranger: I walk across sand And find myself blistering In the hot, hot heat 
    And the winner of our strange little game, for being the weirdest of them all:
  • Stranger: A kiss from your lips,
    Wine-dark, intoxicating,
    Steals my breath away.
    You: wowww, romantic.
    Stranger: nbd
    You: here’s your picture  (There was a url here)
    Stranger: lol i wasnt in it for the tits
    Stranger: im not gonna look that would be degradin i just wanted to see if i could remember how to write a haiku
There are a lot of laughs to be had with this game, and I can’t thank Kyle enough for coming up with this genius idea. If you decide to give it a go, make sure you leave your hilarious results in the comments!

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